Choci, I began Zazen 33 years ago and began systematic training in mindfulness 25 years ago. They have run alongside my martial arts and informed my attitude.
Webbeyes, if someone grabbed my shoulder then I would consider that an attack and act accordingly. I think that we should train to notice the intention to attack and this is a big part of what we should be doing in the Dojo.
Also I have noticed that often if there is too much competition training and not enough power training then the tendency to pull strikes gets trained in – which can have tragic consequences in the real situation. The safest option in any fight is to go for a clean knockout before you get to grappling range or into a square off. In the latter two instances there is more likelihood of injury to both parties.